Satirical news outlet The Onion has acquired Infowars, the right-wing disinformation platform owned by Alex Jones, following a court order to auction off Jones’ assets to compensate families of Sandy Hook victims. The Onion intends to replace Infowars’ harmful content with humor, aiming to dismantle the platform’s legacy of spreading misinformation and exploiting tragedy. Jones has reacted angrily to the news, falsely claiming that the acquisition is being carried out by “imperial troops” while simultaneously promoting his alternative platforms. This acquisition represents a significant victory for the families of Sandy Hook victims and a step towards limiting Jones’ harmful influence.
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The satirical news website The Onion has won the bankruptcy auction for control of Alex Jones’ media empire, including the far-right conspiracy website Infowars. The Onion plans to shutter Jones’ platform and rebuild it with its own humor writers, effectively ending Jones’ ability to spread harmful conspiracy theories. This move, supported by families of Sandy Hook victims who Jones defamed, aims to hold Jones accountable for his actions and prevent further harm. The sale of Infowars comes after Jones was found liable for defamation and ordered to pay nearly $1.5 billion in damages to the families.
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Eugene Vindman, a Democratic congressional candidate in Virginia, has received a cease-and-desist letter from his MAGA-endorsed opponent, Derrick Anderson. The letter demands Vindman stop airing adverts that poke fun at Anderson for using images of a “fake” family in his own adverts. Vindman’s adverts include a voiceover stating “Derrick Anderson was caught using a fake wife and kids for his campaign”, and images of an Anderson lookalike playing with cardboard cutouts of children. The images used in Vindman’s adverts are publicly available on a National Republican Congressional Committee databank. The Anderson campaign contends that Vindman is using the images to lie to voters about who they are.
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Tucker Carlson, a former political chat host on CNN and Fox News, has claimed that he was attacked and “physically mauled” by a demon while he was asleep, leaving him with scars and bleeding from “claw marks.” He made the claim during an interview for a documentary and said that the experience led him to start reading the Bible. Carlson did not detail where or when this alleged attack happened. He was dismissed from Fox News after the company settled a lawsuit with Dominion Voting Systems over false election-related statements and conspiracy theories. He has since been campaigning for former President Donald Trump.
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Trump Roasted by McDonald’s Staff: ‘Where’s His Hairnet?’
The recent spectacle of Donald Trump appearing at a McDonald’s drive-thru has left me in a state of profound disbelief and, dare I say, amusement. The thought of a man who has spent most of his life in ostentatious wealth trying to engage in the everyday hustle of flipping burgers is laughable. Imagine the chaos that would ensue if he actually had to work a full shift. I can’t picture him lasting even an hour without throwing a tantrum or inquiring about the nearest escape route. He has lived in a realm so detached from everyday struggles that he would be completely bewildered by the demands of the role.… Continue reading
Trump Makes Fries at McDonald’s in Bizarre Attempt to Troll Harris
I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw the headlines – Donald Trump, the former President of the United States, actually making fries at a McDonald’s in what can only be described as a bizarre attempt to troll his opponent, Kamala Harris. As someone who once worked as a cashier at Target, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of disbelief at the audacity of this stunt.
To match his trolling efforts, some have suggested that Harris should borrow millions from a slumlord, Fred Trump, and then lose it all.… Continue reading
I must say, when I first came across the headline “Don Jr boasts dad knows McDonald’s menu better than Harris ever did,” I couldn’t help but let out a quirky chuckle. I mean, seriously, is this where we’re at in the midst of what has been dubbed the “dumbest presidential election” of our lives? It’s a real head-scratcher to think that knowing the McDonald’s menu inside out is now considered a badge of honor.
I gotta hand it to Don Jr, though, if there’s one thing his dad excels at, it’s probably ordering Big Macs and Filet-O-Fish. I mean, the man reportedly spent over 31k on McDonald’s in just twenty-one months!… Continue reading
The wind. Something so natural and elemental that we take for granted in our everyday lives. But leave it to Trump to turn something as simple as the wind into a bizarre, nonsensical ramble. I mean, seriously, who gets upset about wind turbines ruining their view? Oh, right. Trump does. His vendetta against windmills seems to have stemmed from his golf course in Scotland being spoiled by an offshore wind farm. Talk about being petty.
During a recent speech, Trump went off on a tangent about how windmills, or should I say wind turbines (because apparently, he can’t tell the difference), are falling down, rusting, and ruining the countryside.… Continue reading
“I’d be sunbathing with my beautiful body if I wasn’t running for president,” says Trump. Can we take a moment to digest the sheer audacity of this statement? This man really believes he has a body worthy of admiration, comparing himself to President Biden no less. The image of a shirtless Trump conjures up visions of a waterbed with a head on it, or perhaps Jabba the Hutt with a spray tan. It’s enough to make you want to reach for the bleach he once suggested as a COVID remedy.
As I read through these comments, I can’t help but feel a mixture of disgust and disbelief.… Continue reading
I can’t help but chuckle as I read about Fox News cutting off a ranting Trump and then mocking him for still talking. It seems like a turning point, a moment where even those who have enabled him for so long are starting to see the cracks in the facade. Trump’s delusional claims of success and refusal to accept any sort of reality or criticism are on full display, and even Fox News, who built their brand around him, seems to be fed up.
It’s comical to see Trump grasping at straws, trying to maintain his grip on a narrative that is slipping through his fingers.… Continue reading
John Q. Hosedrinker 
Matt Underwood