By John Q. Hosedrinker 
The planned June 14 military parade, coinciding with the President’s birthday, exemplifies the grandiose narcissism often seen in powerful political figures. This behavior, mirroring patterns of narcissistic abuse in families, destabilizes institutions through the manipulation of truth and the creation of volatile uncertainty. Such tactics, including policy reversals and crisis manufacturing, aim to control others emotionally and maintain the narcissist’s image. Countering this requires recognizing these manipulative tactics, setting boundaries, and building resilience through collective action.
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I’m a psychologist specializing in narcissists, and understanding this personality type is crucial to addressing the Trump phenomenon. It’s not enough to simply label him as “a problem.” We must recognize that he’s a symptom, a particularly flamboyant figurehead for a far larger, more insidious issue. The enabling behavior of the Republican Party, the support of powerful oligarchs and corporations, and the influence of organizations like the Heritage Foundation are all integral parts of this equation. Trump, with his easily manipulated, childlike nature and profound lack of self-awareness, serves as a convenient shield deflecting criticism from these true power brokers.
The first step in dismantling this system isn’t reactive firefighting – scrambling to fix the latest mess Trump creates. Instead, we need strategic restraint, a calculated refusal to engage in every provocation. This isn’t weakness; it’s disciplined resistance, mirroring the approach of individuals like House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries, who has wisely avoided reacting to every Trumpian outburst. This deliberate withholding of attention is a form of “gray rocking,” a technique used in therapy to deprive narcissists of the fuel they crave – the drama, the attention, the emotional reactivity. Hyperbole and hysteria only empower them; denying them this fuel is how we begin to dismantle their power.
Next, we need to establish clear boundaries. In therapy, this involves consistently setting limits. On a national scale, it means reinforcing the constitutional checks and balances that Trump has systematically undermined. The exploitation of legal loopholes to expand his power has exposed vulnerabilities in our democracy. We must remember the foundational principles enshrined in our Constitution; it is not just a legal document, but also a psychological safeguard against the insidious control of narcissistic leaders.
Building resilience within the population is equally vital. Narcissistic abuse is deeply destabilizing, and its power stems from the very distress and isolation it fosters. We need practices that promote emotional regulation and strengthen community bonds. Collective care and self-care are not luxuries, but revolutionary acts of resistance. Rest is not retreat; it’s essential for regaining the clarity and unity necessary for collective action. Solidarity and shared action are key to overcoming this challenge.
Finally, we must embrace the long game. Narcissistic manipulation thrives on urgency and chaos, but real change requires patience, clarity, and a sustained commitment. We cannot fight fire with fire; instead, we must recognize, mourn, and actively resist this form of toxic influence. Setting boundaries, promoting civic engagement, and developing long-term strategies are the cornerstones of healing our democracy. Just as in therapy, recovery begins the moment we break free from reactive behavior and reconnect with our fundamental values.
This isn’t simply about Trump; it’s about dismantling the system that created and sustains him. Ignoring the underlying power structures while focusing solely on the individual is a mistake. We must expose and confront the enabling Republicans, the corporations profiting from the chaos, and the extremist organizations pushing this agenda. Focusing solely on Trump allows the true perpetrators to remain hidden in plain sight. Without addressing this broader context, any attempt to “stop Trump” will ultimately prove futile. This requires a multi-pronged approach, a concerted effort across multiple levels of society, and a profound shift in how we approach political discourse and participation. It demands a concerted, unwavering commitment to safeguarding our democracy, not just from a single individual, but from the larger forces that empower him.